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I turned 75 last Friday (13th)...a milestone of sorts, and on a suspect day.
It’s happened several other times, eleven other times actually. I’m not superstitious at all, so no big deal. But it did get me in a reflective mindset. What was I doing every 7.5 years down through all those years?
At 7 ½ years old, November of 1954, I was in 2nd grade in a little two-room school in Skinners Eddy. Miss LaFrance was our teacher, a tall, slender, silver haired lady who had taught my parents in their youth. I had broken a collarbone in a cap gun fight with a brother during that Autumn, and Miss LaFrance drove me to school every day while that crooked little bone healed, so I wouldn’t get jostled on the bus. She made me feel special.
Seven and a half years later I was bumbling along pitifully as a high school freshman in Algebra 1. Nobody in that school was less prepared for the mysteries of solving for “x” and “y” than I was. I can tell you with my head held high, I cheated as hard as I could, trying for something above a D-! I spent every day in that class listening to a language of utter gibberish. At least that was what I heard. Mr Worthington promoted me to Algebra 2 simply because he couldn’t face a second nine months with me.
Life moved on and in November 1969, I was closing in on the end of a 12 month tour of duty as a disc Jockey on Armed Forces radio in Turkey. Three and a half years in the Air Force, a six month Early Out just a week before Christmas, and I celebrated the New Year by burning my eyebrows off over a gas stove top lighting a cigarette for a girl who had no matches. I hadn’t matured a heck of a lot in those first 22 ½ years of life! I blame it on algebra angst.
I spent four of the next 7 ½ years misbehaving rather spectacularly at Penn State. You may have read about the four mile sleep walk on an Interstate in Mississippi. There were lots of other examples. In a frenzy of effort to grow up, I married a young coed, and by May, 1977 we had moved to Silver Spring, Maryland, seeking fortune and fame. I turned 30, and became a loan collector for a commercial bank, a position that banks hate to acknowledge because it means they made bad loans. Collectors are lower than whale poop when it comes to being accepted in banking circles.
During that stretch from May ‘77 to November, ‘84 I became a father for the first time, which was pretty wonderful. The little guy expressed his love for dear old dad one morning as I picked him up for a goodbye kiss before leaving for work, by vomiting against my chest, literally filling the pocket of my dress shirt to overflowing. The bank branch I managed overlooked D.C.’s 14th Street Bridge, onto which an airplane leaving National Airport crashed during rush hour, killing dozens and falling into the Potomac River.
The next 7 ½ year span saw the marriage crash, and with that I returned to Bradford county, where I quickly established my inability to sell Radio advertising. Maybe if I had paid more attention in algebra class…Nah! It was also during this segment of life that I turned 40 and remarried, expanding my dadhood to encompass four daughters along with the barfing boy child.
By May of 1992, I had gotten out of that line of work and was well on my way to proving I couldn’t sell cars either. The ensuing 7 ½ years saw stints on local radio and a return to the automotive world, this time as a service advisor. The old adage “if you can’t do, then you teach,” kind of served here. I couldn’t find the right end of a wrench, let alone use it. I couldn’t identify an air filter or a disc brake, so I told you when you needed them. I’ve mentioned here before, the standing rule was “Don’t let Lloyd touch the tools.” I have a small tool box in my garage, but it’s just there for show. There are things in there I’ve never held in my hands.
It was during the November 1999-May 2007 segment of this tale that tragedy struck. The devastating fire that destroyed Bob’s Honda was a loss for the entire community, not to mention for all of us who worked there.
The transfer and eventual sale of the relocated business early in the May 2007-November 2014 part of my story saw me returning to the Valley’s Choice Radio, where I expected to be carried out with a toe tag. Doing something you love and doing it well means you’re never getting up to solve for “x” or “y”...unless you’re some kind of math freak.
By the time late 2014 came around, some of the fun had become harder to find, and a couple months short of birthday number 70 in 2017, I walked out the door with an idea for a newspaper column in mind. And five years later, here we are.
A long, strange journey with an untold number of people left behind and an equal number of questions about life’s many choices. It occurs to me: those “x’s” and “y’s” were really about “ex’es” and “why’s”!
Contact Lloyd Davis at ldpsu74@yahoo.com
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The 2021 Athens Area High School Homecoming Parade was held on Wednesday, Oct. 6.
Scenes from the Sayre Homecoming Parade
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